Sometimes i wonder and wander off into the distance and starts to imagine a life with me being straight, I wonder what would I be like, would I be a player or a douche hated by girls?
Would i actually play sports like soccer? hahaha okee thats funny, sexy, sweaty, hot me equipped with muscles and all. Damn now I want to be like that and be all in love with myself lol.
What if theres a man who loves me, then it would just be the same as the girls that claimed they like me right now. It would be just the same then.
Then it clicked to me that, would my life actually mean anything? because i dont my current life does. What is a meaningful life anyway? Why does it has to be meaningful? Why can't we just go with the flow?
Then it reminds me that we are just slaves of capitalism. It doesnt matter if we have made millions, we would still be in the system. We are lived by the mind set of being a slave without even knowing. Media Media Media
So how do we get out? Pack your things and move into the woods, thats how. Obviously its not that easy, I dont need to explain it here, just watch the movie 'The Village'.
We can start to blame the Europeans for this tho, no not really. Ok so i just woke up and i dont know what im blabbering about, so have a good Sunday peeps!
Saturday, December 11, 2010
Goliath goes Fishing
Heyyyyyy, yeah i know been a while,
Suddenly i feel inspired to write, random thought much. the big bang playing on youtube, and it inspired to write. what? yeahhhh.
Anyway so this is what currently is happening, i sit for 15 papers, passed 10 and failed 5 and now i have to retake a whole new syllabus of 14 tougher papers, yeah so not funny. but my problem does not stop there.
1. i have to tell my dad. which i really hate to see him disappointed.
2. it costs around 30-40 k ? which is so not funny
Now the thing is, i dont know if i should tell my dad i hate doing piloting, i mean even if i take the new syllabus i dont think i can pass since i have such hate towards piloting. I hate the subjects, I hate the students, I hate the Instructors, I hate the environment, I hate the politics, I just basically hate everything, I know if im actually in a different course things like these would still happen, but at least i have passion for it and not just doing it for the sake of my parents you know what i mean? Its just tiring to even pretend right now.
My life would be more meaningful if i were able to do things that i could be doing, i mean , imagine this, you want to dye your hair hazel brown but you mother force you to dye it yellow, won't you hate that? I fucking would.
So yeah, just wish me luck tomorrow on telling my dad. finger crossed.
Suddenly i feel inspired to write, random thought much. the big bang playing on youtube, and it inspired to write. what? yeahhhh.
Anyway so this is what currently is happening, i sit for 15 papers, passed 10 and failed 5 and now i have to retake a whole new syllabus of 14 tougher papers, yeah so not funny. but my problem does not stop there.
1. i have to tell my dad. which i really hate to see him disappointed.
2. it costs around 30-40 k ? which is so not funny
Now the thing is, i dont know if i should tell my dad i hate doing piloting, i mean even if i take the new syllabus i dont think i can pass since i have such hate towards piloting. I hate the subjects, I hate the students, I hate the Instructors, I hate the environment, I hate the politics, I just basically hate everything, I know if im actually in a different course things like these would still happen, but at least i have passion for it and not just doing it for the sake of my parents you know what i mean? Its just tiring to even pretend right now.
My life would be more meaningful if i were able to do things that i could be doing, i mean , imagine this, you want to dye your hair hazel brown but you mother force you to dye it yellow, won't you hate that? I fucking would.
So yeah, just wish me luck tomorrow on telling my dad. finger crossed.
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